AITA, I feel hubby is being mean and invalidating. Oh, 8 months pregnant and severe infection (Lyme or babesiasis)

Please give it to me real. Tell me If I’m being a hormonal jackass cause I owe hubby an apology. A lot of things have been going but the main issue is lack of proactivity and helpfulness. Today he says I’m grinding him everyday and requiring long talks about his shortcomings. I will admit that I can be a broken record but on deaf ears. If change were implemented we wouldn’t be having these conversations. The last argument he said he would ask me more how I need help and try to take initiative more.

A couple scenarios: I am currently on leave of absence/ unofficial bed rest because of a severe infection. Yesterday was a bad day. This was verbally made known, it was 530 pm and I was still in bed. My husband asked if I wanted to walk the dog. We do this together daily. The past couple days I’ve declined. Yesterday I changed my mind, I’ve barely been out of bed. We come back and eat dinner. I say again I feel like shit. Time to take the cat out, another daily. He wants to go to the front so he can sit. He gives me the leash and sits, the leash isn’t long enough for me to also sit. I absolutely need to sit today I’m not having a good day. Nothing. I look over at the cat a bit sour. He’s having a super good time in the grass. I say it again. He gets up and takes the leash from me. Maybe this isn’t a good example, maybe I was a bitch for expecting him to put my needs above his. I really could have just moved the cat. I’m the asshole here.

I have a shrimp tank and it’s been difficult to use tweezers to feed my fish their frozen food. I’ve asked twice this week if he could feed them as my hands hurt and have no strength. He asks are you going to feed your fish it’s been days. I’m struggling today. Can you help me out again? Nothing. I’m going to use the washroom if you can get the food out of the freezer, I’ll do it if you’re not going to help me. Full resentment, I take full responsibility.

He scolded me about the dog (13) he is on meds due to doggy dementia, he sleeps all day. I’ve tried taking him out to pee all hours of the day. He refuses. Anything short of me full on handling a 90lb dog, I can’t get him out. He was upset the dog hadn’t been out. Did you try before going to work? No, he doesn’t wake at 6:30am. I’m asking for help, I’m sick and 8 months pregnant. I cannot lift the dog out. I can barely walk or I would try harder. Instead of just taking him out you scold me about it.

It doesn’t seem that bad, he’s been mean and invalidating. He says I wasn’t sick because at the time he had the flu and I wasn’t as sick as he was. He wouldn’t believe me until my labs came back positive for Lyme. A couple years ago, I told him I was sick and needed to go to the hospital. He said I was fine, ended up septic.

Expectations too high? I shamefully told him he’s like the guy on the bus who wont give up his seat for a pregnant woman/elderly until he’s asked and gives attitude about having to do it. I don’t know. I’m complaining about nothing.



Submitted July 23, 2022 at 09:18AM by tinnamariee https://ift.tt/ZLslJHj

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